That was then. This is how...I've changed?
About two decades ago.....
* I shared my zeal for life and empty ramblings, taste in music and love of the sun, with friends on the beach, by the bar, in the night club or in a letter. We roamed in loud, raucous, carefree groups. We laughed and cried...together.
|Me & Murray, the Giant Trevaly|
Getting a big catch rather than
being one. HI 1992
* We immerse ourselves in individual, insular enjoyment; trainloads at a time, delirious with devices. We ignore our parents' advice and talk happily and randomly to strangers, often faceless and faraway, as though our own existence depended on it. Real life risk and adventures exchanged in furtive one liners in cyber space using words without vowels.
|Wind in my hair, water in my shoes.|
It's been a lovely cruise - Jimmy Buffet
* I read in snatches and get text reminders of when I'm due for a check up at the sun clinic.
* I drank more bourbon, was young, dumb and full of fun, and was careful about how long it took to get ready to go out.
* I drink more coffee, am prone to loud bouts of shouting, which goes largely unnoticed, and am careful to remember to put shoes on before going out.
|Anatola, Turkey July 1993|
Traipsing around the world has more likely strengthen my resolve, sharpened my senses, and fine tuned my desires. That is to say, time has only cemented what was and is, me. I'm no more smarter, nor no more cynical than I was twenty years ago. Just a little more resigned and given to winking with an 'ah yes' expression to other peoples' affirmations. I'm still prone to bouts of idiocy and wanting to dance and sing out loud; I just channel it into Wiggles songs now. And move with more caution.
So after spending precious seconds agonising over whether or not to say Yes, to invite the past into the present, I have finally deduced that it is better to be laughed at and laugh with those that remotely know you or otherwise in this life because I'm not sure if they'll have Face Book in the next one. After all,
Today is just the Tomorrow you were worried about Yesterday.